Sunday, March 31, 2013

Happy Easter

I haven't had much to write about so I just haven't written but I am keeping up on everyone else's blogs but haven't done much on the comments... I will work on that.
I have been so lazy lately- I have had bronchitis and just haven't had the want or energy to get up and do much that along with the kids having been home on spring break has really put a damper on my sweat time- I will not be surprised if I see a small gain on weigh in day.

Friday night i was sitting there minding my own business enjoying a piece of string cheese and a slice of turkey (thin sliced sandwich meat) and I got stuck- I felt it and what did I do I took a few more bites thinking it would help push it down but we all know that it doesn't work that way so for the next half hour or so I spent my time BPing- not a pretty picture. So the next morning I had a shake knowing I should take it easy but we had a pot luck at the hubs club and I fell victim to the deviled eggs. I had one and I was could feel it just sitting above my band- slowly making its way down so then I felt that a burger would be a good idea.... I apparently left my brain at home. I was able to "force" down a quarter of it then I passed it off to my son. But somehow when we got home with the party loot for the kids I noticed those damn evil jelly beans... I love jelly beans, but only around Easter. How is it those sugary gobs of heaven slid down so easy?

After the party the hubs and I dropped the kidletts off at their Nana's and headed off to Carmax- they were able to get us financed and we found a van online so we beelined to the lot and spent the next 2 hours getting our van appraised (they gave us $500 more than we thought they would), then the start of paperwork, then a test drive- I loved it! then more paperwork, a little break, the last of the paperwork then the keys! It had to have been the easiest car buying experience I have ever had. So what did we get?... a 2012 Chrysler Town and Country it only had 30k miles and it was a steal at only $22k.  It is so pretty and new and loaded with lots of gadgets that I may never figure out. You know I love my hubs when I let him drive it off the lot and back home.

Well today was Easter and that damn sugar giving rodent showed up with goodies for the kids and then had the nerve to leave the leftover crud in the pantry- damn Hershey kisses, Resses mini cups and jelly beans.
After the sugar rush the hubs took the boys with him to his meeting then to lunch, just the guys and then to Lowe's to get a does of testosterone and law stuff, seed, mulch and manure.... yumm
While they were doing their thing I was in my car playing with different buttons, the princess was "helping" so I will have to go and play again when she is not with me so I can really figure out things. Then she and I went and got McDonald's... damn chicken nuggets jumped right into my bag and then into my mouth. By this point the boys were home so I sent the princess out to "help" them so I could start prepping dinner. Baked Apples, Glazed ham, mac and cheese, steamed veggies, rolls, potato salad and strawberry shortcake for dessert... somehow that was the only thing I got a picture of.
That's pretty much whats been going on around here. Hope everyone is doing well out there and that you had a good weekend. I will leave you with a few pictures of my kids enjoying their waterless water balloons that the Easter "Boobie" gave them
have a great week!


Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Weigh in day

Just a quick check in- down another 2 pounds bringing me to 170.2- so close to the 160's- I'm sure to be there next week, I hope. In total I have dropped 46 pounds since surgery. Now I just have to get over the crud I have so I can get back to sweating.
Hope every ones having a great week. Thanks for stopping by.

Friday, March 22, 2013

Thank God Fridays over

Yesterday I had a fill- just a "smidge" and for those who would like to know how much a "smigde" actually is, it is .3cc  Last month my doctor said that my 10 pound loss was good and that you couldn't do better than that. This month it was 12 pounds and he again said I couldn't do better... we'll see what numbers I pull next month :). I was also told my blood pressure was low and to talk to my primary about it- I think that I may wean myself off the pills I'm on right now.
Skip to today-
Well after being on all liquids yesterday- oh so satisfying,I wasn't really hungry this morning and had a little stuckness (it's a word) when I took an allergy pill so I didn't eat... not even water.
So as usual Fridays are grocery days. I dropped the princess off at Nana's house (because grocery shopping with a 3 yr old is not something I like to do) and went to Wallyworld... man I hate that place; but they price match and have already low prices so I go and I deal with the slow lanes- and there are usually only 3 open.  Anyways, not really having eaten today or yesterday I tried my hardest to avoid putting those sabotaging items in my cart; I did pretty good but it is Spring Break so I had to get things for the kids to eat plus I had a Scentsy party and needed refreshments (I always overdo it). So there I am - waiting so patiently for the chick behind the register to finish up with my coupons when I felt light headed, sweaty and weak the next thing I know I'm being picked up off the floor by the guy behind me. I had passed out at Walmart- or I could say that the floor reached out and hit me in the back of the head. I got up, finished the transaction and was then swarmed with people - OK 3 people checking to make sure I was OK. they sat me down, fed me a king size Snickers bar and a bottle of water. I declined medical assistance - I felt so stupid for not having eaten I really just wanted to get home. So I filled out the incident report and sat for a half hour while I let my blood sugar get back up. Then they helped me to my car- I guess to make sure I didn't pass out again on their property. Thinking back I'm glad it happened there instead of while I was driving- yikes, that could have been uglier than the bump on the back of my head.
I'm not sure if passing out was blood pressure or sugar, regardless I never want to have that happen again- Mental note- EAT BREAKFAST.

ok, thats all for now- thanks for stoping by- Have a great weekend.

Wednesday, March 20, 2013

WTF Wednsday

Had to check my clock to make sure I'm not too late and I still have a little over an hour to get my Wednesday post in :)

I am going to be totally honest with you- I am gassy! I mean the Hindenburg had nothing on me. I usually get gassy with aunt Flo but this month I am setting records. And its all gas no actual movements so on top of being bloated and crampy from TOM I'm bloated and crampy from this.

Before I was banded I would have what is affectionately know as the "trots". I would eat something- anything be it a cracker or a greasy cheeseburger and I would have to "trot" to the nearest bathroom, I knew where every bathroom was no matter where we were. But now that I am not eating all the crap anymore I don't have to crap nearly as much... sorry- this may be a little crude. So I go from one extreme to the other. I take my fiber to help keep things moving but It seems more and more lately that I'm stuck. I have taken to taking a softener once a week to help keep me "pleasant".

Has this happened to you? I will be seeing my doctor in the morning and I may ask him or I may just toot my own horn.

But anyways that's all the crazy crap I have for today.

Thanks for stopping by- Hope you're having a good week.

Tuesday, March 19, 2013

Weigh in day and NSV's

On top of being a girl I have allergies from hell- my nose is stuffed and runny at the same time (how is that even possible) and my chest is full of crud. All this ickyness has played havoc with my workouts- the last time I actually did anything workout related was last Thursday so I was pleasantly surprised that I saw a loss this morning- 1.6pounds gone taking me down to 172.2. I am so close the the 160's I can't wait.

Some of the things I that I have noticed with the weight leaving my body is  my back doesn't hurt all the time. I actually looked at my hubs last night and commented that it had been a long while since I had to take something for my back pain. I also have noticed that when I sit down I no longer do the shirt fluff. You know where you pull the shirt out of your belly rolls and fluff it gives the appearance that there aren't as many rolls than there actually are. I am also not saying that I'm tired all the time but I still take my naps- I would be a total b*tch without it.

I go in on Thursday for a fill- I'm thinking just a little dab will do me- I feel very close to my zone. Right now I think I'm at 6.8 cc in my 10 band. We'll see what the doc has to say- I mean after all he is the professional and I am forking over money for his expertise.

Well that's all for now. I hope you're having a great week and discovering NSV's of your own.

Sunday, March 17, 2013

I'm a girl- caution TMI

I'm a girl! That's usually how I announce to my hubs that aunt flow has arrived. Man do I hate this. When we were trying to get pregnant all those years ago I found out that I had PCOS. I had no idea what that was I had to go home and look it up and it explained so much, mainly why I didn't have a regular period. Well many blood test, injections, egg retrievals and 3 rounds of IVF I became pregnant with 2 beautiful healthy boys who are now 11 and are pushing their luck on a daily basis, but I love them none the less. After all that pregnancy fun I went back to being irregular until my doctor put me on met formin to help me lose some weight, but what he forgot to mention is that it causes ovulation... well a few months later I found out I was pregnant with my baby girl. Don't get me wrong, I love her (but i don't always like her- damn the toddler years) but I never thought in a million years I would have anymore children besides my boys and then.. surprise. Well as overjoyed as we were we made sure that we would not endure any more surprises so while they were evicting her from my cozy womb they cut and tied me off but left the baby oven in there... I wanted them to take the whole damn stove but nope they just cut the gas lines... Since her birth I have been regular... WTH?! from the time I became a "woman" till the time I became pregnant with my daughter I was never regular...and since her birth I can set my watch to it. Yes the whole menstrual cycle is a wonderful and miraculous thing, blah, blah, blah but I have no use for it anymore- I have all the children I care to have. I am looking forward to menopause just so I can be rid of this evil, gut wrenching, cramp causing, emotional roller coaster causing, 7 day long event that happens every month. Yes I said 7 days. 7 days of hell for me and everyone around me. And as I see it I should be hitting menopause in about 10 years, just in time for my boys to be moving out and my daughter to be hitting the threshold of "womanhood". My husband better start saving up so he can get his own place cause I'm sure that it won't be pretty with her and I competing for most emotionally unstable.

So why did I feel compelled to blog this? Because I am eating everything in sight. It's as if my band is non existent. I read that many of you tighten up when Aunt Flo is around, not me- anything and everything goes down fine. I was hoping that with me so close to my green zone that I wouldn't have this issue this month, but that doesn't not seem to be the case and I am scheduled for a fill on Thursday. So do any of you have this non existent feeling during TOM? Should I reschedule my fill or keep it? and is there anyway to stop having periods without surgery?

OK, that's all for now- my body and brain are tired and my body is bloated and cramping so I'm going to bed. Here's to everyday new beginnings.
thanks for stopping by. Hope you had a great weekend.


Thursday, March 14, 2013

just a quicky

I was doing very good today as far as food and exercise and then tonight it hit- PMS cravings- not my usual chocolate, well yes I always crave chocolate but I wanted salt... uggh . I have grazed on cheese puffs and the kids candy and who knows what else in my foggy hormonal condition... All I can say is tomorrow is another day and I will try my best to avoid the kitchen and bad choices in general.
Hope you are having a good week- thanks for stopping by.

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

WTF Wednsday

Today started out pretty normal; got up got the boys out to school snuggled with the princess and then took her to Nana's so I could hit the gym. Tore up almost 400 calories there- felt pretty good about myself-  hadn't really been to the gym in a week so I was in desperate need to get my sweat on. Went and picked up the princess and headed home to where I planted two more flower pots- I crave color in this dust bowl of a city. Finally nap time- usually the only way I can get a nap is to have the princess nap with me... she was out and I was up- staring at the ceiling...i have never had a problem napping - I just kept thinking of working in my yard. - Let me just clarify that I am not your outdoor kinda girl- the sun and I do not get along, but I have been craving natural vitamin D.
After I finally gave up on taking a nap I sat in total silence and read.... well with the exception of my husband working on our swamp cooler on the roof. When he came inside he was hot form working outside and totally dehydrated and very cranky and I was his outlet- nothing physical or directed towards me but you could feel the hostility as he was finishing up in the house so I went and grabbed a hand full of M&M's... ok several hand fulls.  Then as I preparing dinner I nibbled... ok gorged on leftover mack and cheese.... and then more M&M's.... I was quickly falling down the rabbits hole and felt the need to get out of the house and run... I tried so hard to ignore this urge but it won. I strapped on my sports bras and laced up my Nike's and out the door I went. This for me is odd, I am not a runner. I will do sprints on the treadmill to push my heart rate up but not for the pure pleasure of running but tonight I wanted to run and I did... I also walked but the main thing is I got up and moved out of my comfort zone and it felt good. Then to top things off I went in my back yard and did lunges and jumping jacks... I HATE jumping jacks. The last time I did an actual jumping jack has to have been in high school. Even when shredding with Jillian I never really did a jumping jack.. I faked it. But that was 40 pounds ago. Amazing how much easier it is to do things when you don't have the extra fat holding you down.
So today I burned a total of 600 calories.
oh and a few NSV's- I noticed that I have actual shoulders and a collar bone and I am getting some deffinition in my arms. Also when I work out I have to strap my girls down and before my tummy would be much farther out than my chest, well now my chest is out farther than my belly. And when I run/do jumping jacks I don't Jiggle as much in the belly.
well thats all- I hope everyone is having a good week. Thanks for reading.

Tuesday, March 12, 2013

weigh in day!

Got on the scale this morning and had to do a  double take even a third take then had to take a picture so that I could give the scale a break- another 3 pounds gone bringing me to 173.8- I have lost over 40 pounds since surgery. Now working on 50 - working at 10 pound goals at a time.

Happy Tuesday- hope you have a great day.

Monday, March 11, 2013

motivational monday

I have been having a hard time with emotional eating lately so this is my motivation for this week.
Hope you're off to a great start to the week. Thanks for stopping by. 

Saturday, March 9, 2013

Been a hellofa week

I have mentioned in past posts that my husband is a recovering alcoholic. He did most of his drinking at home and was never abusive.He would drink and then pass out either on the couch or in the room and then after the kids were in bed I would eat out of loneliness. Having grown up in an alcoholic household this was the normal for me. But last July my husband decided he had had enough and started on the path to sobriety he was doing very well and then the pink fluffy cloud lifted and he became frustrated and easily agitated. I knew it was a matter of time before he would fall and he did. This past Wednesday he holed himself up in a hotel room and did some serious damage. Thankfully he came home the same day and luckily without injuring/killing anyone on the roads. Anger was my first reaction, at one point I did punch him in the face... then I went through the what could I have done to keep this from happening. I called his sponsor to let him know what had happened and then waited for him to pass out which he did and what did I do, I ate- I wish there was a switch to turn off the emotional eating, instead I have to reprogram myself so that I do something else when I'm emotional. I have a treadmill and I had been using that but it got old fast- I guess I need to dust it off and saddle up and get back on there otherwise I will be back in the 200's real fast.
He has been going to meetings since he woke up on Thursday and is back on the road to recovery. I had even gone with him to his first meeting after falling off the wagon. They were so happy that he found his way back and were proud of supporting him through this. I married him for better or worse and in sickness and health- and alcoholism is a sickness.
I haven't worked out since Wednesday and I feel like crud because of it. I have been kinda of hoping to have that "tight" feeling that so many feel when stressed but no, I am still able to shovel it in. I have done a bit better today food wise, well I did until I decided to get pizza, cake and snacks for my boys and their friend for the friends birthday (his dad really fell through so I took it upon myself to make sure he had a nice celebration). I started out with 2 slices of pizza- still within my calories for the day but then I had another slice and some wings and some cheesy puffs not to mention the cake....oh the cake- so yummy. I am already experiencing a headache brought on by the sugar rush that I am not used to.
But tomorrow is a new day and a fresh start. I can get over this emotional turmoil without binging on food. I will find better ways to cope. I am worth the effort, the sweat and the tears.
Thanks for reading- hope you're having a good weekend.

Tuesday, March 5, 2013

Weigh in day

The weather here has been glorious here in Las Vegas- there are some perks to living in the dessert. So yesterday I spent a few hours out in the yard raking and cleaning up- I personally hate the sun- pale pasty white girl and big ball of fire in the sky  do not get along well, but I actually enjoyed the sun yesterday (but I did get a little pink in my cheeks). This enjoyment could be because I'm losing my natural insulation and can tolerate the heat a bit better, I guess the real test will be this summer when we hit 120. But anyways that's how I got my sweat on yesterday.
Today I dropped the princess off at pre school and spent an hour and a half getting my sweat on- burned 430 calories and I feel good. I'm incorporating more weights to help tone up the loose parts that come with the territory.
I was shocked that I actually lost weight this past week - I have been pretty sloth like and grazing like crazy. But I lost 1.2 pounds bringing me to 176.8; that's just one pound away from 40 pounds lost since surgery, but my friend pointed out to me that I am not losing pounds - because when something is lost you tend to find it, no I am shedding, terminating, killing, destroying them- whatever the word, they are gone and as God as my witness I will never see those pounds again.
Hope you're all having a great week so far. Thanks for stopping by.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Weekends kill me

What is it about weekends that turns me into a starving sloth? I eat my meal and then think to myself I didn't eat near enough that I should have knowing that I have and I go back for more or worse I graze. I don't keep a lot of crap in the house and what little I do is for the kids and not appealing to me at all but I do have a collection of fiber one brownie bars, skinny cow candy/ice cream and the weight watchers ice cream... I figure if I am going to snack I want something tasty and not too horrible...well it tends to be horrible when you keep reaching into the box to get another brownie or ice cream. And the fact that I slack off on getting my sweat on (unless you count my recent hot flashes). I need to get out of this rut and do something on the weekends, well everyday to keep me busy and out of the kitchen. I know I'm not hunrgy I'm bored and instead of getting creative and doing something I eat.
What do you do to keep from eating? I know I can not be the only one out there that goes through this.
well thats all for now- I am really hoping that my grazing doesn't tilt the scale in the other direction, I guess I will have to wait until Tuesday to find out.
Thanks for reading- hope you had a great and productive weekend.

Friday, March 1, 2013

day from hell... so far

Well it didn't start that way, started as it always does to my daughter waking me up at 7:15 wanting to watch her show that doesn't start until 8:30. Got the boys out to school, layed in bed for a little bit then to the couch (my new couch, and yes I love it) decided that the house wasn't going to clean itself so off the couch I go. The house was clean and then I went to vacuum... but instead of sucking my vacuum was blowing- we just got this vacuum 6 months ago and just replaced the filters a few weeks ago. I was working perfectly the other day but not today. Then I went and met the hubs for lunch at a little Mexican hole in the wall just around the corner from us. The food was awesome and I ate way too much, I took some home but still too much at one time. Got home and decided that my mobile trash heap of a van needed to be cleaned out, got that done and decide to try and unjam the DVD player... no go. At this point I hear my daughter screaming bloody murder- she had slammed her finger in the front door to the house. Got her all cleaned up and better just in time to get to her "sing and shout class" at the rec center- but my car decided it was done as in dead, would not start. So i plugged in my battery charger and tried that- no go... Now I have a 3 year old screaming in the car because the car is broken and she can't get to class. My mother in law who lives 2 streets over and is usually always home was out at the store and the hubs was back across town so no class today. Then there is my cookie dog, she is a 16 year old shepard/lab mix that my husband adopted for me around our first Christmas that we were married- she is getting worse every day- hubs and I are starting to really think that it is her time. She is blind in one eye can hardly see out of the other, can hardly hear, her back hips are really bad that she has a tendency to slip and fall when climbing the 4 steeps into the house and she can't control her bowels - the thought of putting her down seems so selfish but to keep her in the condition that she is in just because also seems selfish.  Oh and my sister called to tell me that she is going to have to find a new place for our mom (she is in a full time memory care facility) becuase they keep raising the rates. She had lived with my sister for almost 4 years before we decided that she needed to professional care and now we need to start over and find her another place to live.
So that brings us to now- I have just eaten a skinny cow ice cream sandwich and am trying to keep from eating my frustrations. I am ready to crawl back into bed and pull the covers over my head and hide- thank goodness nap time is a half hour away.
ok... thats all for now- i just hope the rest of March gets better.
Thanks for reading my rant- I really hope you are all having a much better day than I am. Have a great weekend.