Thursday, October 10, 2013

I'm here- now what

A whole month without posting... dang- I have alot of blogs to catch up on.
I am ok- just needed to distance myself from my blog for a while- needed to get a better perspective on things without the "audience" so to speak.
So what have I been up to... same ol same ol- being mom to 3 rowdy kids and wife to one amazing husband who has turned his life around and I am so grateful that I stuck around to see it happen.
The boys and I did go to meetings with people who are in the same boat as us and we really enjoyed it. It was so nice to sit with people who have gone through the same emotions that we have been going through. We have put meetings on hold for a little while- we are trying really hard to get our time management in order- both my boys have after school activities so they are not home until 4-5pm, the hubs goes straight to his meeting after work getting him home around the same time meanwhile after pre-k its just me and the princess and recently we have started going back to church- It has been close to 23 years since I have attended a real bible study and service and we figured with this whole new turnaround with the hubs we all could use a dose of Jesus in our lives- who couldn't right?
So while we at open house for my sons school we met one of his Friends and her mom who invited us to attend her church- talk about good timing right- the Lord sent her into our lives for a reason and the boys and I have been attending every Sunday for the past month and just this past Wednesday we went to the bible study - all of us, hubs included- the class was on Fiancees and how to spend according to Gods plan- seriously we needed to go to this class. So I guess I have been getting my spiritual health underway.
Still busy with the PTA but I have come to terms with the fact that I can not do it all and there are actual members out there who are eager to help so I have relinquished some of my self appointed duties and I feel very comfortable with it- and seeing as I am a control freak this is a big step. 
Weight wise I am still in the game, just not as active as I should be- my last recorded weigh in was 144.6 and today I am 143.2 so I'm still under my goal- just need to work on getting my self back to the gym or even on my treadmill- that and stay away from the cookies and cream ice cream that happens to find its way into my mouth on a daily basis.
The only other thing I have to post is that is suck when someone steals your debit card info- I went to check the account htis evening to see what we had left and low and behold two transactions one $190 the other $45 to two mail order companies- really, like we need this in our lives- but I am handling it much better than I would have before I started back at church- I am confident that things will work out and that he has a plan and that we just need to follow him... Yes I know I am a little church focused but this is the best I have felt mentally in a while and I am very grateful that I have renewed my relationship with God.
well that's all- thanks for checking up on me and seeing whats new with me- I will hopefully have a chance to catch up on everyone blog soon.
have a great rest of the week and God bless

Tuesday, September 10, 2013

weigh in day

I knew it would be a gain - 2 pounds exactly. I have been reverting to old habits of eating my emotions and not drinking enough water and haven't got my sweat on in months. I am trying not to dwell on this and am trying to get back on track but shit keeps happening in our lives-

First before I begin to vent/wine about how bad my life is let me say that I am very blessed- I have 3 healthy children, a warm home, I am lucky enough to be able to stay home with my kids and provide a loving home for everyone, I have a loving husband who has a steady job with a decent income and who is doing everything in his power to combat his demons- even if it means it keeps him in meetings day after day and leaving me to be mom AND dad for the most part,  but lately I feel alone even though the house is full and now one of me good friends has "unfriended" me on FB with not so much as an "F you" I have tried calling, texting and tried even re-friending her with no success- I have asked a mutual friend of ours and she has no idea and neither do I- my other mommie friends are on the other side of town making it hard to really see them and then there is my husband who if he isn't at work then he is at a meeting or helping someone with their demons leaving very little time with him. I am feeling the financial stress of his demons- our finances are still in the red from them and though we know it will take some time we will get back in the green but I have been expecting a refund from my surgery- $826 a nice piece of change right? well I have been waiting and waiting and I finally get a call that the refund is ready but they are applying it to another account that I have with their hospital... UGHH! I can't seem to catch a break... I am trying very hard to be understanding and I know that I owe that money but when I call every week and they say that it should be ready next week (for the past 3 weeks) and then I get a call saying its ready but you cant have it is very frustrating.... I am still shaking and trying very hard to keep myself grounded and out of the kitchen.


Well I have since spoke to the hubs and he helped get me peace of mind back saying it is what it is and that we will get through this- meanwhile I have avoided the kitchen and have taken the princess to Pre-k - I should have got right on the treadmill when I got home but my mind is still full of finical issues and PTA things... but I am still resisting the urge to go to the kitchen and raid the cookies and ice cream.

Now that I have accomplished that difficult task of using my will power I will go and pick up the princess and perhaps put on a workout video and have her sweat with me.

Sorry about the rambling and whining - sometimes it just helps to write things out and get my thoughts on paper.

Ok- I'm off for now- thanks for stopping by.

Saturday, September 7, 2013

loss of my fur baby

This morning went as expected- not good. My Jack Rat had paralysis in his spine arthritis in his back legs and the mass that was on his back leg that we though was just a cyst may have actually been cancer. There was nothing much that could have been done that would have guaranteed a long life for him and keeping him with us in the pain he was in would have ben selfish so we made the decision to have him wait for us at Rainbow Bridge where he will be healthy and can run and jump again and will keep Cookie Monster company until we reunite. I was with him the whole time- I held him and pet him and talked to him as he slipped into his deep sleep- He was a great dog, so loving and was very loyal even to the end- I will miss him beyond what words can express.
The hubs showed up as soon as he could but wasn't there as he took his last breath but he did say his goodbye this morning- it was very hard for him as it was for me
When I got home one of my boys asked where Jack was and all I could d was shake my head and he broke down which started the other one to crying that made me cry again, the princess is too young to understand that he wont be coming back- trying to explain that God is holding onto them at the Rainbow Bridge until we are reunited is not an easy task. The newest fur baby, Shatzie knows something's wrong because I keep crying so she has been sitting right next to me more so than usual.
My boys right now seem to b ok but I keep crying into my bowl of ice cream... not good I know but right now I don't really care. The pain of this will eventually fade and I will come to grips with his passing but right now it is fresh and bringing up memories of my Cookie Monster too- I miss them both so much right now.
Well that's all I can bare to write right now- I'm sorry that this was not a happy post but it was necessary. Thanks for stopping by and if you have a fur baby please give them a hug and a kiss for me.

Friday, September 6, 2013

take the good, take the bad, take them both and there you have my life...

Ok, so yesterday I finally remembered to call and get into my band doctor to get some fluid out- I had been having too many stuck/BP moments and heartburn- they were able to get me in with the PA- it was her first time dealing with me and I don't think I liked her- with my doctor I hardly feel it but with her I swear she used me as a pin cushion- ouch! But other than that it was pretty quick and I was out of there in 10 minutes. Today has been better but I did over do it this morning and did have a small episode.
While I was there I was weighed and I was at 142 that's a drop of 7 pounds from the last time I was in there so I'm pretty happy with that- now if only my life would slow down a bit so I can get to the gym.
My kids are back in school- even the princess; she is there from 9-11:30 m-th so that give me a little time to go but this past week I was at the school doing PTA stuff for he beginning of the year and am finally slowing down on that.
Now between getting 3 kids to 3 different schools, keeping the house in some kind of working order, keeping their standard student attire clean and ready for the next day of school the hubs is going full force to his meetings and the kids and I have started to go to meetings for us, then the hubs truck batteries dies- both of them (he has a diesel engine) so we had to spend a fortune on batteries and the overtime that he had worked was barely reflected on his check due to a pay cut and health insurance payment- so just a little bit of stress going on financially and time wise and now tomorrow I have to take my Jack rat to the vet- he is unable to use his back legs- He can not go out on his own- I have to carry him out then hose him off because he can't stand up to do his business, he does "crawl" by using his two front legs but it causes him so much pain that if you touch his front legs/paws he winces and growls in pain. He has been like this for a few weeks but we haven't been able to fit his vet bill into our budget until now and I'm afraid of what the vet is going to say. He had been limping before this but on his front leg- but after we put cookie down it got worse- we adopted a friend for him hoping it would bring him out of his depression but it only seems to have gotten worse... I am really not looking forward to tomorrow. - sorry to be a downer but this is really weighing on my heart and mind tonight
sorry about my ramblings... its just been a crazy long week. thanks for stopping by hope your week is running smoother than mine

Tuesday, September 3, 2013

Weigh in day

As is the routine for every Tuesday for the past 40 weeks I steeped on the scale and today it read 142.6 a gain of one pound- seeing as I have not been drinking near enough water and eating like I don't have a band even though it reminds me every time I over do it I'll take it.
But now that the boys are back in school and the princess is in Pre-k from 9-11:30 I don't have any excuses not to get my butt off the couch and get back to moving.
TOM is gone and the cravings are subsiding- although I now have a taste for ice cream again...but Its gone and I do not plan on buying any anytime soon... well that's my plan we'll see what happens
but I do hear the cookies calling me from the other room... uggh... where is my will power

I know what I need to do its just a matter of doing it- well that's all for now- thanks for stopping by

Friday, August 30, 2013

I'm still alive- if anyone cares...

I am in a slight pitty party mood- TOM is here and has brought along massive cravings and no will power, I have been shoveling ice cream and candy into my mouth like its going out of style - but on the bright side my husband who has been battling his demons has decided that enough is enough and has stopped smoking things other than cigarettes and has come clean to his sponsor and his friends and has recommitted himself to the program so that makes me very happy.
It has been a very long couple of weeks. Last week was getting everything finalized for the welcome back breakfast for the teachers plus the meet and greet at 2 different middle schools plus the meet and greet at the school I'm PTA president at- but I just got word that the princess has been accepted into the Pre-K program so now there are 3 schools that have to deal with me - yes I am one of "those" moms.
This week has been full of getting kids ready for school and into the groove of school- plus getting the boohoo breakfast for the kindergarten parents on Monday followed directly by the princesses Pre-k interview... its a program that the school just started last year and is funded by a grant and can only have 18 children - so they have to interview and right now they have 40 children on the waiting list... yikes
I did weigh in on Tuesday but didn't post it so here it is...141.6 a 2 pound loss from the week before - sadly no picture but I promise its right.
I know I need to go in and get a slight un-fill but I am having a hard time remembering to call and get in during the day- I usually remember at night when I am feeling filled to the brim only a few bites in and by then its too late to call- I think I will put in a reminder in my phone so that I actually call and get in- I have been yacking way too much and its not a pleasant feeling or experience.
Now that the princess will be in Pre-k from 9-11:30 I will now have time to get to the gym not that I didn't have time before I just had more excuses than time.. same old story right.
September is going to bring with it new opportunities to get back on track and I will begin the maintenance portion of this life long journey.
ok I'm done for now- hopefully it wont be so long before my next post. Thanks for stopping by. Have a great Labor Day weekend

Tuesday, August 20, 2013

2 weeks worth of weigh ins and a staycation

It has been over a week since I last posted- lets see what has happened... not a lot.
Lets begin with last weeks weigh in - 146.0 a drop of .8 from the week prior.
Today is my next weigh in - 143.6 a drop of 2.6 pounds !!! :) (happy dance commence)
I had mentioned at one time that I was going to take my boys to one of the downtown hotels to have a mini staycation- wasn't as fun as they would have liked; all of our friends bailed on it so that left just the 3 of us.
We checked in and got settled into our room- waited a bit to see if anyone was gonna show.. well that didn't happen so we headed to the pool... first off let me say I love, love, love sharks... and this pool surrounds a shark tank and has a tube slide that goes right through it. Will was the first of us to go down, he loved it so of course I had to try it too- it was a lengthy line for a quick ride (isn't that always the case) but you go down so fast you cant really look around when you slide through the tank. Rob didn't feel up to going down- them being boys they got hungry so we headed up to the room where our snacks were. we all got dressed and decided to head down and walk around the Freemont Street experience- it is five football lengths long- and the boys and I walked it (getting them to walk around is like pulling teeth but they did it with out complaining once)
We eventually ended up at one of the food courts inside where the boys had subw@y and  had Z@bas. Then we walked again- got some st@rbucks and then to get a souvenir for each of them.
We ended up going back to the room earlier than I would have liked, all the smoke and crowds were really getting to my boys - so we went up to the room and after I felt that they were safe and sound I went and got them a deep fried tweenkie, deep fried 0reos and a frozen banana- let me just say - it's not all its cracked up to be... the best part was the fried dough around the treat itself.
Eventually my walking stomachs wanted food- MEAT! so down we went to get a chili dog and chicken fingers, and then back to the room to eat and then finally to sleep.
we woke up early enough to head to the pool before check out- I didn't want to leave. I could have watched them swim for a life time. Then back to the room to get our stuff and head home. Other than that bit of fun its been pretty dull.
I am already starting with PTA planning stuff and even helping with planning my 20 high school reunion- so I have been pretty busy with hanging out on the computer and doing research on ideas.
 
well that's pretty much it for now- sorry about my ramblings- here are a few pics from our "trip to Vegas"
Me and Robert

Me and William

My boys

My sharks (my kids are the far left heads)

William

 
Robert with his St@rbucks and sunglasses that he picked as his souvenir

as up close and personal you can get without a cage 

Robert

William

Love this pool

mesmerizing

tranquil
my Elvi

Don't poke the bear

Will- bear hug

Rob- bear hug

Robert- camera hog

my little princess
 
ok- I think that's all- hope I didn't bore you. Thanks for stopping by- hope you have a great week
 
 
 


Friday, August 9, 2013

WARNING**RANT**the walmart way has pusshed me over the edge-

ok- let me warn you this is post is a vent and could get very long winded and I can already feel my blood pressure starting to rise at the thought of the events of the day.
I headed off with Robert to do our bi-weekly shopping trip at the walmart on craig and nellis (here in vegas of course). The day started as usual- took about 2.5hours to fill up 2 carts full of food then headed to the check stand (1 of only 3 that were open- of course) waited in line about 20 min before we even started putting our groceries on the belt. Ok, no now its our turn- put all of our items on the belt and have all my price matches at the back (common courtesy right) so we get to the price matches and right off the bat I know that from listening to another customer fight with he price matches that I too am going to have some fighting to do. So here we go- produce first- I have a match for pineapple- 3 of them for$5 so 1 would be $1.66 right- well because apparently this is too low a price they want to see the add... uh the ad that they say on commercials and on their corporate site that you do not have to have.... well I had most of my ads-the ones I didn't have were because I saw the sales circular online- and this happened to be one of those- so Agnus my cashier calls over a CSM- which I figured out later that that stands for complete stupid moron. anyways Rob the moron comes over and I explain that I saw the sales circular on the stores website- right away he points out the sign that says they do not match online prices.... I explain that it is NOT an online price but the price on their sales circular that is posted on their website - he argued say that was an online price. My argument that it was just the same as going online and seeing the newspaper circular at say k-mart or target on their website but with groceries- he was not budging- even after I threatened to cancel my transaction... I decided it wasn't worth it so I told them to put it back... so we keep having this issue on price matches- asking what store, and to show them the ad, again- what part of "you do not need the ad for price match" do they not understand-
So I play along- even when I get to the meats- that I have pork chops on price match for like 1.88 a pound- the moron in charge said that those prices were for family packs only- I was so done by this point I didn't even grab my ad- I just told him to put it back. so we're done- almost, now its time for my coupons... and those of you who know me know I love my coupons and am still mourning the loss of my printer since I usually print most of mine up- well apparently the check stand I am at has issues with scanning coupons, printed or from the paper- so the Agnus the cashier asks another moron in charge by the name of Victor if she can just key them in- he says no-and that they can take me to another register and transfer my ticket there and try scanning them there but if they didn't scan they would NOT key them in- even though the coupons were manufacturers coupons both printed and from the paper- so what he was telling me was I was crap out of luck- even though at this point my sale had exceeded $400- apparently they didn't care if they lost the sale or not- so I told him to cancel the whole damn thing! he actually asked if that's what I wanted to do- hell yes it was- by this time it is getting close to 4- I have had it - I am so done with their crappy customer service, the stupid policies they have that they seem to change on a daily basis, and the morons that run the store. I vow never to step foot in their stores again- I am even transferring my prescriptions to a different store just so I don't "have" to go there ever again. 

oh and I have used their real names in case anyone is interested, oh and just so it's clear all remarks here are solely mine (but most likely many others have had similar experiences)
 The hubs has already called corporate and I should be getting a call back next week- I will keep you posted.

oh and let me just ask ya'll out there- if you are a price matcher like I am- and you see an ad for 9.99 on dog food (16-18.5 pounds) and all they have is the 20 pound bag that has the 1.5 pounds extra for free (so basically the 18.5 pound bag price) wouldn't you expect them to price match it? Yeah me too.

Well I am going to sit back and let my blood pressure come back to a healthy level and then decide what store will be getting my money from here on out.

hope ya'll are having a better start to your weekend than I am
thanks for stopping by- oh and if you have a Wal-Mart horror story let me know- I would love to hear it.

Tuesday, August 6, 2013

weigh in day, fur babies and furniture

As is always the norm on Tuesday mornings, I wake up to my daughter telling me to wake up- then I head to the loo to do my business then I step on the scale- I usually know where the scale will be (scale whore remember) but the numbers have been all over the place so I had no idea what the numbers would read. I was pleasantly surprised when I saw 146.8 on the scale! A two pound loss since last week. Just another 1.8 pounds till I'm at goal... and then we will see where I want to go.

Now to my fur babies- earlier this year we had to put my Cookie Monster down due to health issues, she was 16yrs old and had a long and happy life full of love. 7 years ago we adopted our Jack Rat- I believe he had a lot to do with Cookie living so long but now that she is gone he has gone into a depression and since the cats want nothing to do with him we decided to adopt another dog- she is about 5 yrs old, a Rottweiler and such a sweet heart. She has the name Chola... not really something we like so we are going to try to train her to answer to Schatzie - German for little sweetheart. She has been in the shelter since June 26th this year and she will be freed Thursday when she gets to come home with us - my kids are so excited, I just hope our Jack Rat will be excited too.
Schatzie
 

My boys share a room- its a decent sized room but they each have a queen size bed and had 2 separate dressers- I did combine them into one dresser but the room is still pretty packed- I mean these are two 11 yr od boys. So I have purchased them futons that will fold out into full size beds along with new dressers and a desk... downsizing but adding to the furniture... Hopefully it works out. I might post pictures later- If I can make it into their room alive. wish me luck
 
Tomorrow is my interview- I am hopeful that I get it but kinda not- does that make sense? I love the thought of brining home a paycheck and being around other adults and using my brain on a higher level but the thought scares the crud out of me. I have been a SAHM for 4 years now- my boys are going into middle school and my daughter starts pre school and I really want to be there for my kids but I know that they are growing up and don't "need" me around all the time- but I also remember being their age and my mom asking if I minded if she went back to work- I did NOT want her to go so she stayed home and realized that all I wanted was to have the security of her being there- cause all I would do was get home from school, put my things away say hi to mom then off to play until dinner... so why was she there? I'm torn- I guess I'll see how the interview goes before I get myself into a panic attack over it.
 
Well that's all for now- I'm off to pick up furniture and then to assemble it (does that count as a workout?)
Have a great day, thanks for stopping by.

Sunday, August 4, 2013

this ime last year

I was celebrating my 38th birthday- and at my heaviest weight of 225- today I weighed in at 148- I love my band.
Sexy face right- I hated having my picture taken... still not to fond of it
(btw. I miss my boobs)

this was taken last year august 4th - what a difference a year makes when you have a piece of plastic wrapped around your stomach ;)


I have been tight because of TOM and have been sticking to shakes and soft foods to avoid the infamous BP (been happening too much lately)
If I am still tight after TOM leaves I will be making an appointment to have a little taken off the top.

Speaking of taking a little off the top- I finally got my hair cut. I have know my hair dresser about15 years, long before she started doing hair. So she has seen me in all stages of hair and weight loss... and now that I am starting to get my hair back from the weight loss she talked me into a new do... Let me just say I am one who stays with what I know. My hair is usually just below my shoulder and either pulled up on the sides or in a pony tail... I hate having my hair in my face. Well she talked me into an A line bob cut.... I think her goal was to make it to where I couldn't wear a pony tail anymore... goal accomplished. I still not used to it but I do like it... just weird seeing a totally different style (plus I threw some color on it cause it was looking horrid)
this was last night August 3rd
 
 
We are seriously thinking of adopting a new fur baby. My Jack rat seems to still be in a depression since the loss of our other dog - so we think a new friend may help.

my jack rat
 
I other news I actually have been putting my resume out there and I got a nibble- an actual interview for this coming Wednesday - seems so weird, the last time I had an interview was back in 2004... I actually had to go borrow something to wear from my sister (something I would never have been able to do tis time last year). I don't want to say too much about the job possibility cause I don't want to jinx it- but if you think about it, please send some positive vibes, good juju, or a few prayers my way.
The job is not a matter of life or poverty- the hubs has a good job and I love being a stay at home mom but I would love to have some interaction with other adults and if it includes a paycheck why not- plus it will help us take care of my mother in law- she is fighting for disability and is really struggling to keep her head above water.
 
ok, enough about that- how has your weekend been? my legs, butt and thighs are a bit sore from Carolyn's 30 day squat challenge you can check her out on FB - Carolyn's Corner Weight Loss Support Group 
 
Well that's all for now- thanks for stopping by- have a great day!
 

 
 
 
 
 

Friday, August 2, 2013

not WLS relatedbut I NEED to vent

I have always tried to keep with the thought process that if something doesn't happen than it just wasn't meant to be and that something better may be on the horizon - well in some cases that just doesn't hold up.
Let me start at the beginning- and please bare with me as this may get long winded.

My husband has been with the same company for 8 years and in the past year is attitude and work ethic has improved greatly since he got sober - but has always had a good work ethics. Well this past spring his immediate supervisor retired leaving an opening that needed to be filled. His co-workers had persuaded him to apply for the position, so after much thought and prayer he decided to give it a shot- now with this company it is not just a simple application- it took him a few hours to finish it and once it was scored he was given an interview along with a few others that had passed the application process (my hubs did score the highest from within the company to be considered for the promotion) After the first interview he was told by a few people that were on the interview committee that he did very well and that he should be getting a second interview. Up until this point he had tried to keep from getting his hope up too high as he usually gets crushed when things don't go well (as we all tend to do)
Well he did get the second interview- it was between him and someone from the outside world; not too shabby right, so now he's getting pumped and really wants to get the position because they are always saying how they want to promote from the inside.
He goes through the second interview, again getting great reviews from those doing the interview again feeling really good to where he starts thinking what he will need to do when he gets the job, not IF he gets the job.
So he gets to work the other day and is told that he needs to meet with the manager-  so he calls me to tell me it can be 1 of 3 things... he's getting written up, he got employee of the month or he got the job... the thought that he didn't get the job didn't even cross his mind.
So he meets with the manager- let me just clarify that the manager was not in the interviews and is only going by what the scores and notes from the interview committee and the applications. He is told that he didn't get the position - he is crushed and keeps it together while he gets the "pep talk" saying that it was close; there were only 3 points between him and the other candidate, don't think of it as getting passed over, if there is another position that opens up he will be the first one he thinks of, blah blah blah, then he follows up all that smoke that he's blowing to suggest that he get more experience in a specific area...   well the hubs at this point is just wanting to get out of there and lick his wounds.
So the rest of the day he is mulling over all that he has heard from his manager and it dawns on him that the area that he was told to get more experience in is a position that he had held for 5 yeas and was a supervisor in that area while at his previous job and yes that was discussed in the interviews and was on the application. So now he is mad rather than crushed and realizes that the manager had no intention of hiring.
this was yesterday
Today he finds out from a few other supervisors and people that were on the interview committee that he was never going to get the job because the manager wanted to hire the other candidate because he was retired military and so is the manager- they had just gone through the motions to make it look as though they were doing things by the book- just as he had realized
So now he is even more pissed that he got his hopes up and that they played him knowing that they  were never going to promote him even after the manager had talked to the department saying that he was going to promote from within as was the usual policy...
Now his moral is down as well as many others in his department and even other supervisors- no one wants the other guy and I know its going to hell when he takes the position.

well that's my vent for now- I am so mad that he had to go through all tat crap and that he was played and what hurts most is that I can't make it better. I really hate when I can't fix things to make people feel better.

thanks for reading- I hope I didn't bore you.
Thanks for stopping by, I hope you have a great weekend.

Thursday, August 1, 2013

TTT

1. I missed my weekly weigh in- I'm down one pound from last week. I'll take it!

2. I had an appointment with my band doctor on Tuesday and he says I am officially in the 25% BMI

3. Wednesday was mine and my daughters birthday- we didn't do much of anything, but we did go out to dinner at Sweet Tomatoes... they can be pretty pricey but I had a coupon so I decided on thatfor dinner

4. I finally got rid of the last of the birthday from the party on Sunday- meaning I gave it to my mother in law. I had actually managed to avoid it yesterday and decided I wanted needed it out of the house.

5. TOM is lingering in the background - I just wish he would show up already and get it over with- I'm bloated and swollen, crampy and achy

6. Because of TOM coming my band has decided to get as tight as a drum making eating a chore- I have been having shakes for breakfast and for lunch and I have to be careful with dinner

7. for my birthday the hubs and kids got me a Samsung tablet- I love it and yet I'm on my lap top... old habits die hard.

8. I am so over this summer, it has been pretty boring and uneventful.

9. To add a little fun to the summer I plan on taking my boys to Fremont Street to stay at one of the hotels and take advantage of their pool and then wander on freemont street and maybe take in a movie.

10. I really need to get off my butt and get moving again. but I have started a 30 day squat challenge posted by Carolyn's Corner Weight Loss Support Group on FB - go see her page and add to the support.

well that's all for now- I'm going to pop a midol to help ease the achiness and bloating I have going on
thanks for stopping by- hope your week is going well

Monday, July 29, 2013

not so motivational monday

OMG it's Monday night and I haven't posted since last Tuesday
Am I the only one who loses track of the days on summer break? the only way I realize its the actual weekend is when I see the hubs 2 full days in a row.
I can't believe there are 4 weeks left of my kids summer break, I feel as though time is flying yet stalled all at the same time. and yet we have done nothing exciting - It has either too hot or too expensive... I really hate that there is nothing really kid friends and cheap (besides a park) here in Vegas and every time I think "lets go to the pool" there is a storm on it's way. So here we sit and here I stay. I have no motivation on this Monday.
Last week I was doing good, I actually saw 146 on the scale- (scale whore) but the number doesn't count unless it's weigh in day on Tuesday- and today I got on and saw 149...uggh. And I don't see anything really changing between now and weigh in day tomorrow.
Last week my food was right on target in fact some days came in under target. And then Saturday rolled around... This coming Wednesday is mine and my daughters birthday- so the hubs took me to dinner- one of my favorite places- Jer ry's Nu gget- their prime rib is to die for!  But I was good, instead of getting my normal 8-10 oz portion I shared with the hubs... I had the salad to start and then had what seemed to be a good 3 oz portion of the prime rib, a small chunk of the baked potato- not bad right... I avoided the garlic toast and avoided drinking during my meal- I ate slow and started feeling full so I put back the little bit of prime rib that I couldn't finish... but then she asked if we wanted desert- oh lemme tell ya, this place also have a killer bakery that makes the most awesome ├ęclairs I have ever had just short of my own mothers home made ones- so of course the hubs and I had to share one... and we did pretty good- we cut it in half and put one half in a to go box and then spilt the other half in half...  awesome dinner - just a little overboard but nothing near what I used to do.  Well we proceeded to go out that evening and enjoy some much needed couple time- and at the end of the night I decided I "needed" another taste of that ├ęclair... I ended up eating the other half all by myself and I wont even get into the 2 am stop at the De1 Tac0 drive through...hanging my head in shame...
Well Sunday I woke up to finish the final preparations for my daughters birthday party. And what is a party without party food. We had nacho cheese chips, cheesy puffs, corn chips and cheese dip, potato chips and French onion dip, I did have a veggi platter with fresh made ranch dip and a fruit dip with a sugary sweet dip... OMG- it was also tasty and I grazed all afternoon... not good, not good at all. And what birthday is complete without cake and ice cream. I had ordered a 1/2 sheet cake-  chocolate with a strawberry filling and butter cream icing... yumm! then last night my boys had their friends spend the night- a total of 5 11yr old boys so one of the other mommies brought over pizza...seriously I need to be put in an institution- I was not hungry, I did not feel hungry I did not want to eat and yet I had 2 pieces!  I went to bed feeling sick and bloated then I woke this morning I woke up and had a piece of cake- really! what is my problem?!?!
Right now as I type I know that there is still 1/4 of that cake sitting in my fridge... and I have been picking at it all day- along with picking at all the left over snacks from yesterday. Then I realized I am just a few days away from TOM's arrival... seriously- why is it that my hormones feel that they can control me during this time- It frustrates me to no end- I'm good 3 weeks out of the month and then bam- poor food choices. And the crappy thing is I'm sitting here on the verge of a BP because I decided that on top of the shake I thought would be good for dinner to help slow the damages done by the weekend- it just wasn't filling the void- so I ate some cheesy puffs, and carrots that I smothered in that homemade ranch dip followed by a microwave burrito covered in salsa... and all I can think about is that damn cake sitting in the fridge!- and that cake has managed to get itself onto a plate and sit right next to me... hello will power where are you!?!?!

tomorrow I have an appointment with my fill doctor... I do not plan on getting one- but I have been banded for 9 months so I need to go on in and make sure everything is going good- and seeing as I have lost 75 pounds since this time last year I think I'm doing ok... I am a little discouraged that it has been 2 months since my slight un-fill (to let me eat actual meats for protein) and I have only lost 5 pounds.... and I have been tossing those back and forth on the scale- I know that once the daily routine gets back to normal meaning the kids are back in school I can get back to the gym and start feeling better- I know that is an excuse- I should be able to get to the gym now but my motivation isn't here... hopefully I will find my motivation tomorrow until then I will leave you with a picture of me at my heaviest- 225 and at my lightest 146
my birthday last year- 225

a month before surgery close to 215
 
Saturday night- 146
 
I must remember this! 
 
Sorry for the long post- I hope you all have a great week and that you find your motivation to get out there and sweat!




Tuesday, July 23, 2013

weigh in day

Stepped on the scale and was happy to see the 140's again... 149.4!!! I am hoping to stay in the 140's for a while.
still haven't been that great with the exercise- but I'm moving more than I was earlier this summer.

Well that's about it for now- thanks for stopping by.


Tuesday, July 16, 2013

getting my sweat on

60 minutes, over 3.5 miles of walking and sprints, with 400 calories burned- got good and sweaty and I feel great!
So far today I have only had 441 calories worth of food.... so I want to know- do you eat back the calories burned?

weigh in day

weigh in day today- no gain and no loss- the same weight as last week 151 and seeing as I ate way too many sweets I'll take it.
Also- note to self, if I want to see a change get back on the treadmill and take your thyroid and blood pressure meds-its amazing how those things help. Now I just need to get out and pick them up.


Nothing else to report- thanks for stopping by. Have a great week

Monday, July 15, 2013

getting my motivation back

I have been feeling cocky lately when it comes to my weight loss- and it is catching up to me. 
I had been eating good but not moving but still was losing weight until last week when I had a 1 pound gain and being the scale whore that I am I am sure to see yet another gain tomorrow.  I had a feeling that things were going to bad when it came to the scale when the sugar demons went with me to the store on Friday and several bags of m&m's landed in my cart (I had a coupon-several coupons) plus the bag of chocolate covered pretzels that I ate all on my own. I need an intervention before I get sucked into the deep dark hole.

Like I said it has been a while since I got my sweat on- This past weekend I did start doing some toning exercise (my butt, thighs and arms are still burning) and then today I dusted off the treadmill and walked 4 miles the calorie burn was low (325) but it was a pretty low impact walk but the main thing is I did it. the goal is to do it again tomorrow and then the day after that and the day after that....

I have 2 weeks till my birthday and I would love to be at my goal of 145 but I don't know if it will happen - today the scale was 152- that would mean dropping 7 pounds in 16 days... not impossible but very unlikely. I will just be happy that I am 75 pound lighter than I was last year on my birthday.

here is a picture from last years birthday celebration- hard to believe that I was that person.  this is my motivation to keep going so I will never be that person again

damn I miss my boobs

me and my bestie (yes the lighting sucks but it was a blast)
 
 
thanks for stopping by- hope you have a sweaty, productive, fat burning week!
 


Tuesday, July 9, 2013

weigh in day

weigh in day- a gain of 1.2 pounds- bringing me back to 151. Though I am not happy by the gain I am not surprised by it but I will not let it define me. I could blame water weight and the heat but seriously I have been lazy and haven't done much so this does not surprise me- plus my eating this past week has been bad- I sent the hubs out to get me chocolate and he did and I ate... a lot of it- not to mention the cake and bread that Robert made last night ( I have had way more than I should have) but I will get back on track because I am worth it.
I have seen the 140's and have proof that the scale can dip that low- I will get back on track and refocus and will do it.

thanks for stopping by. Have a great day

how about a quicky?

Nothing too exciting to write about. Been staying home with the family this weekend- between the heat and the fires up on the mountain it is not very good air out there.

One of my boys has decided that he wants to be a chef when he grows up- he loves to cook and experiment. the other day he was looking at my cook books and found an old recipe of my grandmothers for miracle whip fudge cake. He wanted to make this so today I went and got what we needed and he made it- all by himself. It was awesome- reminded me of being a kid, my mom always me that cake for our birthdays. He also made a banana bread, again my grandmothers recipe - all by himself... again yummy- but my band was not a fan. It has been sitting there for a good while, hasn't come back yet although I wish it would.
 Now I am waiting so that I can have some water and take my pills and get to bed. Tomorrow, actually I guess that would be later today, is weigh in day and I had a slice of both the cake and bread plus TOM is here and I haven't had a real work out in a few weeks so if I see a loss or the same as last week I will be very grateful; if I see a gain I wont be the least bit surprised. The band is a tool and you get out if it what you put into it. Yes I am being lazy, I know it and I am not making excuses. I will get back on my treadmill and get my sweat on... I keep saying that and it has yet to happen- but I have a new goal- last week my weight was 149.8, I would like to get to 145 by my birthday which is the 31st of this month- so that's a little more than 3 weeks. I'm going to give it a shot and we shall see if it happens. If it doesn't happen by my birthday it will be ok, I will get there sooner than later.

well that's all for now- thanks for stopping by.

Saturday, July 6, 2013

Friday weekly randomness

Here it is, Friday night 11pm and I am sitting in bed- just making love to a bag of Hershey's chocolates- earlier this evening I was with a bag of potato chips... shhh- don't let them know about each other. Did I want to- yes, should I have- no; but I'm a big girl and made my decision - actually TOM has a lot to do with the decision making today... and it hasn't been good.

Today started out ok... we were having friends over, one of my mommy friends birthday was the other day so we threw her a little surprise party and where there's a party there is food and cake. My son made the cake last night and the only thing I did was help lick the bowl... then this morning he decorated it and again the only thing I did was help "clean" up the frosting.
Friends showed up with their kids- I was thrilled to see my friends and have conversations with other estrogen, uterus carrying people. We had the typical crap food to choose from- nacho chips, cheese puffs, potato chips and French onion dip and my favorite chips and rotel dip and then we had pizza and cake- a pure junk food feast. The bad thing is it was at my house and I bought all the crap (with the exception of the pizza- the other mommy's bought that) but still- no fruit, no veggis... nothing at all healthy unless you count the bell peppers, onions and mushrooms on my one slice of pizza- yes, just one slice and I had to force that down on top of all the chips I had eaten. I have been doing pretty good with my food (basically lack of appetite due to the heat)- but TOM showed up today and his good friend poor food choices and cravings came along for the ride. So all my discipline has gone out the window- I just hope it comes back before next weekend when we celebrate another birthday, this time one of the kids ... this time not my kid or my house- but at the mommy who bakes the most yummy treats (I mean she makes Betty Crocker look like an amateur). So it better get back in time.


Tonight we had turkey burgers (that's kinda healthy, right?) and my mother in laws potato salad and home made baked beans- I was so stuffed but kept eating it was sooo good- I love her potato salad and this was the first time she made homemade baked beans and man were they tasty.

So how was everyone's 4th of July? I hope good and safe. Nothing too much to write about from me- we went to a friends house and swam- he had chips and rotel (making me want more, hence my binge today) then for a late lunch some grilled steak (I love steak- who am I kidding I love FOOD) but I only had a very small piece (no room after all the chips and dip) then we came home and the boys and the hubs went out and blew things up, lit fireworks. I stayed inside sitting between the princess and the dog- both extremely freaked out from the noise. I found a 4th of July celebration on the TV and we enjoyed that... the princess thought it was very exciting but didn't want to go outside to see anything live because it was too scary. The logic of an almost 4 year old.
pretty much sums up my neighborhood

mmmm ROTEL!!!!!

Wednesday we went and visited my Great Aunt Nancy at her costume shop- the shop has been here for over 50 years- she herself was a showgirl at the El Rancho and her husband actually worked for Bugsy. She is so full of stories I told her the next time I get over to her I wanted to pick her brain and learn more about her life here in town... to my surprise she has actually written down a lot of the stories so I really look forward to reading that. As a kid I never really paid attention to my mom and dad and their "stories" of growing up- now with my dad being gone for the past 7 years and my mom not having her full mental capacity I really wish I had paid attention - I lost a lot of time that I wish I could get back... so I'm going to make up for it by getting to know my great aunt (my moms aunt)
She's in the middle row- 3rd over (1949)

Posing with one of the many costumes at her shop (2012)
 
 Tuesday we went swimming but I already posted about that- but I did mention that I needed a new swim suit cause mine was hanging off me- well I got one and I think I look pretty damn good in it.
It's a 2 piece- a tank toppish top and swim shorts- I know I had said before that the other suit I was fine in without the skirt, shorts and whatever flounce they add- but I actually feel really comfy in it and that is important to me- especially when I have to chase around an almost 4 yr old at the pool.
this is kinda what the other suit looked like but in black- (sorry for the small pic)
 

here's the top ( I fill it out much better)
 the bottoms I have are shorts - the best part its a size 12!!
 
Goal for the weekend- try not to melt- temperatures are dropping- its a nice and chilly 108 today but 25% humidity (yes I know that's not a lot compared to where a lot of you are but hot is hot no mater if its wet or dry heat)
Also I need to get my self back to walking on the treadmill. I have  plenty of motivation just no desire, I really need to work on that.
Other than that nothing really planned- what about you- any plans for the weekend? Is the heat messing with your workout routines and eating habits?
oh and to beat the current level I'm playing on Candy crush saga... seriously- anyone else addicted to that game?
 
Have a great weekend- thanks for stopping by!
 
 

 
 

 

Tuesday, July 2, 2013

weigh in day and a little bit of mindless rambling

The scale is still going down even though I personally haven't really moved much- but my eating has been pretty good- too hot to really eat a lot and with the heat we have I could just be melting and not really know it.
This morning my scale read 149.8 - the 140's....woohoo! I don't think I have been in the 140's since at least grade school.

I am very happy with my band and my loss of weight and inches- I have actually lost 12 inches off my waist! That's a foot of belly gone, and hopefully one day whether it be by pure body toning, medical intervention or act of God I will have a flat belly.

Today I took the kidlets to the rec center pool with my mother in law- surprisingly it wasn't that crowded. I am happy to say that I actually felt comfortable wearing a bathing suit that does not have shorts, a skirt or a cover up attached to it- however the suit I have is getting too big on me- I mean droopy butt, lose crotch- oh so sexy; so I think I am going to have to go back out and get a better fitting suit.

Does the 4th of July make any one else out the cringe?
Don't get me wrong, I am very proud to be an American but here in Vegas they start up the fireworks stands a week before the 4th and people start setting them off at all hours of the day...and their not just the "safe and sane" fireworks they have the illegal ones that you have to drive and get form the Indian reservation- the big boom kinds that shoot up high in the sky and then their flying sparks come racing back to the hot dry ground and set fires to everything- grass, houses, people... not really a way I care to celebrate. My family usually invests a small fortune on the safe and sane ones that my boys love to light- with adult supervision of course (what is it with boys and explosives?).  My daughter is not too keen on the loud noises so she usually watches from within the safe confines of her air conditioned room. I would prefer to sit and watch televised fireworks shows- no crowds, air conditioned, and I don't have to deal with minor burns of fizzling sparklers.

This past Saturday was the PTA summer leadership training - so as President for the 2013-2014 year I was required to attend. I actually enjoyed myself and found myself actually learning stuff I thought I knew but didn't really know, ya know what I mean?
Oh and there were vendors!! I love vendors! they give you FREE things- seriously I came home with 4 tote bags full of stuff I probably will never use but it was all FREE!!!! My kids were in heaven... I mean seriously- I had 4 chap sticks with different companies logos on them, hand sanitizer, soda/beer can cadies, tape measurers, Christmas ornaments to schools that aren't even in this city and the list goes on. But I did get a few goodies that I did not let the kids take- A roll of wrapping paper, an anklet, a big bag of panda popcorn (milk & white chocolate covered popcorn- I kept that for the hubs)
a nice big coffee cup (a definite re-gift kinda gift). Plus pens from everyone along with information from their company and why we should use them... I never realized how hard it is to pick out a company for a fundraiser- I seriously have 5 companies "wooing" me. (and the gifts keep coming in) Don't worry- I will be using those gifts procured outside the seminar to use for PTA drawings.

My boys spent the night at their nana's house the past 2 nights night- giving me the perfect chance to clean my house. They have been home for 3 weeks and my house shows it. It is very hard to clean in the middle of a dust storm- and my kids are the storm- I do try to keep things picked up to a point but the other night I CLEANED! I scrubbed, I vacuumed, I swept, I mopped, I did loads and loads of laundry and still I cleaned. And then today I let the kids back in the house.... surprisingly it is still clean- but I do not know for how long.

Ok well that's all I have for ya'll right now. Hope you're having a great week. Thanks for stopping by.

Saturday, June 29, 2013

Saturday ramblings

First off it is Saturday at 6am... and I'm up (somewhat willingly)- I have a PTA training class today from 8-4 and I did that whole sleep thing where you don't really sleep because you might oversleep. So now I have about 45 minutes to kill so here I am.

Weather wise right now it's a cool and crisp 91 degrees and should reach only 120 today - Summer hell is here; and with this being Sin City even Satan had to leave because it was too not for him.

Before I forget, Happy Canada Day to all those up north.

I have been pretty lazy this past week when it comes to exercise- it has been too hot to even think of sweating on purpose but my food has been good, again too hot to really eat.

I stepped on the scale yesterday morning just because I'm a scale whore and I saw 148- holly crap on a cracker... the 140's..... woohoo... then I got on again this morning.... 150-  still going down from my weigh in day and now that I have tasted the 140's I want more so I guess I am going to have to put my overheated, pre sweated butt back on the treadmill and bust out my weights.

My niece who lived us her senior year of high school had moved to PA to be with boyfriend and go to collage is moving back to town- as in literally they are on the road right now, just a few hours away... I am so excited to see her. She really helped me out when she was here. She was so upset when I told her I was getting the band, she didn't like the idea of me "changing" who I am... but she has since realized I as a person have not changed but my exterior has- I can't wait for her to see how good I look :)

Back to living in Sin City- let me clear up a few myths- not all of us work in a casino, and if we do we do not live in said casino- we have 596,424 residents (give or take a few) and only155,000 hotel rooms (give or take a few). We do not all gamble, drink or are strippers, showgirls or prostitutes.  Oh and if you ever want to visit- avoid the summer months unless you enjoy temperatures that rival that of the Sun's (even thought the hotel rates are much cheaper)
Personally I have worked on the "strip" but never as a stripper, aint nobody wanting to see all that but I was a housekeeper (ya'll tourist can be pretty nasy at times, someone has to clean that mess up) KENO writer/runner (kinda like lotto meets BINGO) and a hotel operator)
oh and I have lived here for 24 years and still can't tolerate the heat.

Ok well I should get back to getting ready for my training. Hope you're all enjoying a relaxing and cool weekend. Thanks for stopping by.

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Weigh in day and NSV

weigh in day today- another 2.2 pounds gone bringing me to 151.2! that's 64.6 pounds gone since my surgery date and 71.8 pounds since my highest weight of 223. I love my band

Over 20 years ago one of my neighborhood mamas gave me an ID bracelet that was always too snug...I had never been able to wear it without cutting off circulation to my hand. Well I found it today in my jewelry box and tried it on and it fits and with room to spare -


Sorry I haven't been very active with my blog, must be something about the heat here and the lack of anything interesting to post. I will work on it though.
Thanks for stopping by- Hope you're having a great week!